When the Dash for Cash Goes Crash

Today should have been that moment, when the world looked upon Dublin, with crowds in Hiaces heading for Croke Park, to worship the Second Coming … at least that what the five announced (and later cancelled) Garth Brooks comeback concerts where hailed as, as far as I can understand. Well, “Mr. Brooks and Me”, it ain’t gonna happen now …

Mr. Brooks and Me, a broken date - © Bernd Biege 2014
Mr. Brooks and Me, a broken date – © Bernd Biege 2014

What the friggin’ cowboy boot? This is the sale rail at the local Dunnes in Cavan – and a testament to the greed with which each and every shopkeeper from Malin Head to Mizen Head wanted to jump on the Brooks bandwagon. “Look, there is no copyright on the name Brooks, this is generic clipart we found on the web .. let’s print a million of these and really cash in … what can go wrong?” Loads, like the concerts not going ahead. So, unless you want to look like a right plonker, you’d be better off not wearing this cheap knock-off.

Mind you, you’d have looked like a right plonker if the concerts had run anyway … just how tacky can fake merchandise get?

Anyway, when we hit Dunnes last night, I said, “Let’s look for Garth Brooks stuff!” And Herself was looking at me with a very dubious expression. Sort of “you are not serious” kind of way. And lo and behold, in the sales section I spotted those beauties. And called her over.

Not to be outdone, she grabbed another prime example of good sartorial taste from the adjacent rail – already doen to the last six dozen or so, better be quick if you want to be part of “Team Garth”:

Team Garth, missing a leader - © Bernd Biege 2014
Team Garth, missing a leader – © Bernd Biege 2014

That looks like a US university cheerleader’s outfit gone wrong – and again a blatant exploitation of the un-copyrighted name Garth, combined with the legend that was “Team Jedward” and the (now fairly moronic … or post-modern ironic) addition “Dublin 2014”.

But at least you could wear it when going to see the Garth Brooks Tribute Act (my toenails curdle when I hear this), laid on by a local pub to appease those disappointed Garth Brooks fans all stuck in Dublin now. Hand on … the tribute act was cancelled, too.

Let us call this a “Garth Brooks Tribute Cancellation” – or a blatant PR effort by the pub. I might have mentioned that each and every shopkeeper from Malin Head to Mizen Head wanted to jump on the Brooks bandwagon. And still wants to, it seems …

And I’m tellin’ ya, Joe, there’s many a poor man who invested in thousands of imitation Stetson’s from China now desperate to recoup his investment, Joe, it’s the little man that suffers, Joe, and think of the children, Joe …

Be the first to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.


*